Understand your relationships more clearly
Explore love, attachment, breakups, trust, emotional closeness and the questions that can be difficult to answer on your own.
Inner Thought Group relationship assessments are designed to help you reflect on the patterns in your own feelings, reactions and behaviour.
Relationships are rarely just one thing
You can miss someone without wanting them back. You can care deeply about somebody while still finding emotional closeness difficult. You can feel attached to a relationship while also knowing that part of you has moved on.
That is why our relationship assessments look at several dimensions rather than trying to reduce a complicated experience to a simple yes-or-no answer.
Start with the question that feels most relevant to you right now.
What have you been wondering?
Choose one of the available assessments below and explore the patterns behind your responses.
Am I Emotionally Unavailable?
Emotional availability is about how easily you can connect, communicate feelings and allow closeness. This assessment explores openness, vulnerability, emotional expression, self-protection and relationship distance.
Take the assessmentAm I Still in Love With My Ex?
Thinking about an ex does not necessarily mean you are still in love. This assessment looks separately at emotional attachment, nostalgia, romantic desire, thoughts of reconciliation and acceptance.
Take the assessmentAm I Too Emotionally Attached?
Emotional attachment can be a healthy part of close relationships, but it can also become difficult when your sense of security, attention or self-worth becomes too dependent on another person.…
Take the assessmentDo I Have Anxious Attachment?
Anxious attachment is a descriptive relationship pattern, not a diagnosis. It commonly involves heightened sensitivity to distance, uncertainty and signs of rejection. This assessment explores how strongly those tendencies show…
Take the assessmentDo I Have Avoidant Attachment?
Avoidant attachment is a descriptive relationship pattern, not a diagnosis. It can involve strong self-reliance, discomfort with vulnerability and a tendency to create distance when closeness feels demanding. This assessment…
Take the assessmentDo I Have Trust Issues?
Trust is not all-or-nothing. You can feel secure in some relationships and guarded in others, or trust people emotionally while still finding it hard to rely on them. This assessment…
Take the assessmentWhat Pushes People Away From Me?
When relationships become distant, it is rarely possible to reduce the cause to one trait or one person. Still, certain patterns can make closeness harder, including defensiveness, controlling behaviour, frequent…
Take the assessmentWhy Am I Afraid of Commitment?
Commitment can bring closeness, stability and shared plans, but it can also make choices feel more permanent and emotionally significant. This assessment explores whether commitment concerns are linked more to…
Take the assessmentWhy Am I Lonely in My Relationship?
It is possible to share a home, routine or relationship and still feel emotionally alone. This assessment looks at emotional availability, feeling understood, affection, shared attention, meaningful conversation and whether…
Take the assessmentWhy Am I Scared of People?
Feeling afraid or uneasy around people can involve fear of judgement, mistrust, uncertainty, past social experiences, difficulty reading other people or a strong need to protect your personal space. This…
Take the assessmentWhy Am I So Insecure in My Relationship?
Relationship insecurity can come from several different places: fear of loss, comparison, uncertainty about your own worth, sensitivity to distance or doubts about the relationship itself. This assessment separates those…
Take the assessmentWhy Am I So Jealous?
Jealousy can contain fear, comparison, uncertainty, protectiveness and a desire for reassurance. This assessment looks at those different ingredients rather than treating all jealousy as the same.
Take the assessmentWhy Can’t I Say No?
Finding it hard to say no can happen for different reasons. You may dislike disappointing people, feel responsible for their reactions, worry about conflict, or agree before checking what you…
Take the assessmentWhy Can’t I Stop Thinking About Someone?
Thinking repeatedly about one person can be driven by attraction, uncertainty, unfinished meaning, idealisation, hope or emotional habit. This assessment explores those different possibilities whether the person is an ex,…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Fear Abandonment?
Fear of abandonment can show up as sensitivity to distance, worry about losing closeness, strong reactions to uncertainty or a need for reassurance. This assessment separates those patterns so the…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Feel Left Out?
Feeling left out can come from what is happening around you, how included you feel, uncertainty about other people's intentions, social comparison or sensitivity to signs of exclusion. This assessment…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Feel Like Nobody Understands Me?
Feeling misunderstood can involve difficulty expressing what you mean, differences in communication style, fear of being vulnerable, expecting others to infer what you feel, repeated invalidating experiences or a sense…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Feel Responsible for Everyone?
Caring for other people is not the same as being responsible for their feelings, choices or problems. This assessment explores where care may be turning into over-responsibility, guilt, rescuing or…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Feel Unappreciated?
Feeling unappreciated can involve how much you give, what you expect in return, whether appreciation is expressed in ways you notice, how comfortable you are asking for recognition and whether…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Get Attached So Easily?
Getting emotionally invested quickly can feel exciting and unsettling at the same time. This assessment looks at how fast attachment builds, how much fantasy fills in the gaps, how strongly…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Lose Interest in People?
Losing interest after an exciting beginning can happen for different reasons. Sometimes novelty fades, sometimes closeness becomes uncomfortable, sometimes the imagined version of the person was more compelling than the…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Need Constant Reassurance?
Wanting reassurance is normal at times. It can become exhausting when relief is brief and uncertainty quickly returns. This assessment explores what may be driving repeated reassurance seeking without assuming…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Overthink Texts and Messages?
Texting removes many of the cues we rely on in face-to-face communication. That can make short replies, delays and punctuation feel more meaningful than they are. This assessment explores the…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Push People Away?
Wanting closeness and then creating distance can feel contradictory. This assessment looks at what tends to happen when relationships begin to feel more emotionally important: discomfort with vulnerability, fear of…
Take the assessmentWhy Do I Self-Sabotage Relationships?
Relationship self-sabotage can involve testing, withdrawing, provoking conflict, choosing unavailable partners or ending things when closeness becomes important. This assessment focuses on repeated behaviours that can undermine relationships even when…
Take the assessmentDifferent parts of relationship life
Our relationship library will continue to grow around the questions people ask about connection, closeness and moving forward.
Love & attraction
Romantic feelings, longing, attraction, emotional connection and uncertainty about how you really feel.
Breakups & ex-partners
Lingering feelings, nostalgia, acceptance, unresolved attachment and questions about moving forward.
Trust & insecurity
Reassurance, uncertainty, comparison, fear of distance and the ways trust can affect relationships.
Emotional closeness
Vulnerability, intimacy, emotional expression, distance and how comfortable you feel letting someone get close.
Relationship questions can contain several different patterns
Someone can feel strong attachment while having little desire to reconnect. Another person may want closeness while also becoming guarded when a relationship feels emotionally vulnerable.
Where appropriate, your personalised report looks at separate dimensions so you can see which patterns stand out most clearly in your own responses.
Relationship assessments are for self-reflection
These assessments are intended to help you understand your own feelings and relationship patterns. They cannot know everything about your circumstances or tell you what another person thinks, feels or intends.
Results should not be treated as instructions to begin, end or change a relationship. If a relationship involves abuse, coercion, threats or concerns about safety, seek appropriate specialist or professional support.
The relationship library will continue to grow
Future assessments will explore more questions around trust, jealousy, attachment, breakups, communication and recurring relationship patterns.
Not sure which question to start with?
Browse the full assessment library and choose the topic that feels most relevant to you.